Lord Teach Us to Pray

Growing up I honestly don’t recall too many actual conversations that I had with my dad, it’s not that we never spoke, but it was usually more along the lines of instruction, or directives, or correction - he wasn’t the most patient person. Things are a lot different now, we meet for breakfast almost every Friday, and share some great conversations. He shared something with me recently that honestly blessed me in unexpected ways.

My dad said that during his teenage years when he would come home late after being out with his friends, he would pass by his parents bedroom, and quite often their door would be partially open, enough for him to see his father on his knees next to the bed in prayer.

It wasn’t until several years later, looking back on how God had blessed him in spite of what he called his “knucklehead ways”, that he realized it was the prayers of his father (and mother) that protected and kept him, until he finally fully surrendered his life to the Lord.

As parents of teenagers, on your knees in prayer is a posture that you may be pretty familiar with. There was a season where we had four teens in the house, all seemingly pushing the limits on one thing or another, or dealing with some perceived catastrophic event that made the exhortation in scripture to “pray continually” seem a most reasonable response.

Prayer works, not always in the way we want it to at the time we want it to, but it works. And so it is crucial that we are intentionally spending time praying for our children, and I would also say that it is vitally important that your kids actually see and hear you pray for them. When our kids were school age, even into middle school and high school, my wife would pray over each of them every day, leading them to put on “the full armor of God” described in Ephesians chapter six.

When it comes to prayer, the most effective thing you can do for your child or teenager, is not only to pray for them, but to pray with them. Include them as much as possible and encourage them to participate in the practice of prayer.

In my Fatherhood presentations, I often refer to “The Malachi Mandate”, which refers to the scriptures in Malach 4:5-6 as well as Luke 1:17 that point to “turning the hearts of the fathers to the children and the hearts of the children to the fathers”.  When we pray with our children we make a heart connection with them that strengthens the relationship - us with them, them with us, and all of us with the heart of our Heavenly Father.

The disciple cried out to Jesus in the eleventh chapter of Luke: “Lord, teach us to pray”, knowing it was the key to walking in strength, power, and wisdom.  Our cry today is the same, “Lord, teach us - and our children -  to pray”.

Tim Bonzelaar

Director of Fatherhood Initiative