Raising Socially Healthy Teens: Why Relationships Matter More Than Ever

According to research, nearly 75% of teens today report feeling lonely, with a high percentage feeling lonely most of the time despite being more connected than ever through technology and social media. 

It’s safe to say that we have a loneliness epidemic. 

What if the relationships your teen is building or not building today are shaping their future, happiness, success, relationships, and even faith?

Social health (relational health) is not just a nice add-on but a vital part of raising healthy and flourishing teens who will become healthy and flourishing adults who bring good things into this world.

So, what is Social Health?

Social health is creating and sustaining meaningful, life-giving relationships based on communication, trust, and empathy. These healthy relationships allow teens to thrive in all areas of life. On the other hand, poor social health can lead to isolation, conflict, and insecurity, all of which are types of death, a death to the personhood of the teen.

Now is the time to help your child grow in their social health. The social foundation they are building as teens will impact them for the rest of their lives. Yes, it will impact them now, which is important, but even more importantly, it will affect them for decades. Our investment will pay dividends later, either positively or negatively.

It starts at home. You and I, as parents, play a big role in the social health of our teens. Our role is less important now than when they were little, but we still have a huge part to play. 

First is by our example. If we are not socially healthy, it is very unlikely that our teens will be socially healthy. If you are not socially healthy, I encourage you to get the support and help that you need. Find a trusted friend, advisor, pastor, and/or therapist to work on social health.

Second, help your teen find their tribe. We all need a place to belong, and it can be difficult for teens to find that tribe, especially a healthy tribe. So help them. Do what you can to help guide them to healthy friendships. As they get older, their friends will have a greater impact on who they become than we, as parents, will.

Third, teach and model conflict resolution, active listening, and the importance of boundaries. With teens, more is caught than taught, which means we as parents need to model these things in our lives.

Fourth, pray for them and with them. Prayer is our most powerful and effective tool as parents, so let's use it. Pray for them often, pray for their friendships often, and pray with them often, especially about friends.

Mike VanDrie

Pastor of Discipleship & Mission